Why Do So Many People Hate Trans People (Particularly Trans Women)?

 

PGen98

I, Am I?
Community Leader
Please note -- This thread is not meant to bash trans people, quite the opposite, so please do not turn this into a diatribe against trans people or gender non-binary people.

Why is that people today cannot leave people alone to be who they want to be? Racism, sexism, class warfare, homophobia, and transphobia. People only seem capable of hating anything they don't understand. Why is this? Why can't people leave well enough alone and let people be who they need to be? If somebody is gay, bisexual, asexual or straight, how does that impact your life directly? It doesn't, it is only of import to the individual in their quest to be their true self. The same is true of trans and non-binary people, they are seeking to be their authentic selves, and yet a great deal of what they receive in return is hatred and backlash from people who hate them simply for being trans or non-binary, and from people to whom their lives will not be impacted by someone's decision to transition or to come out as non-binary. I don't understand this point at all. It was the same with gay people for a long time, as well. Hated simply for being gay, and many still are, and yet the ones who hate them are probably the farthest thing from someone a gay or lesbian person would chose to be with. So...why the hate? Why hate someone for being themselves when it does not impact you in any way. If a man finds true love, but it happens to be with another man, why should that matter to anyone but them? They are happy, they are in love, let them be. Same with lesbians, if they've found someone who makes them truly happy, but that person tends to be a woman, what difference does it make to anyone but them? None at all, so why hate them for it? It's the same with trans people, their brain aligns with a gender that their body doesn't match, so they're taking steps to remedy that and look and feel as they need to in order to be their authentic selves. So why do people hate them for this? Trans people aren't out there looking to take advantage of people and use them for perverse sexual fantasies as the media keeps wanting to portray, they're just average people looking to be themselves. The level of hatred they suffer as a result of trying to be themselves is astonishing, the thought that any trans person would want to assault another person when they're so busy being assaulted verbally and physically themselves...it's just insanity to me.

I have friends who are trans, good friends, and they're trying their best to live their lives as normally as possible, just as the gender that matches their brain, and yet the abuse they get on a near daily basis, whether through social media or in person, or even from their own family members is just disgusting. Why is it so hard to accept someone as being the person they want to be in order to be their authentic self? It has quite literally no baring on your life what someone is or is not, and yet people actively seek to mock, intimidate, besmirch and belittle trans people for being themselves. It's a shame. I make no secrets about the fact that, based on my upbringing with my mother, I've suffered through gender dysphoric issues, so much so I've contemplated actually transitioning, but I'm self aware enough to know I would both never pass as female, and likely would not resolve my own issues with myself if I did transition, so it is a pointless endeavour for me. I'm content enough being male, even if I hate myself and fellow members of my gender 90% of the time. But this is me, there are many who do need to transition to feel whole, to feel complete, and I believe they should be free to do so without having their very lives endangered just for doing so. Trans people, trans women in particular, are getting murdered at an astonishingly terrifying rate, and the reasons why seem to be completely devoid of any basis in fact or reality. Prejudices against trans women as playing dress up and wanting to assault women without fear of persecution, and so on, just ridiculously unfounded and unwarranted "fears" that have prompted some to not even be able to use the a bathroom of their choosing, or even use the bathroom at all outside of their houses. It's ludicrous!

Why is this? Why are trans people such easy targets, why can't people leave well enough alone and let people be with and do the things they need to do in order to be themselves. A process that does not directly involve anyone but the person and their potential partner(s)? Why does it happen, over and over?

(trying to stir up some "adult chat" level content, so let's hear your thoughts. Whether you're pro-trans or anti-trans, please respond appropriately, and let's please keep this civil, not a big debate or flame fest, just simple talk. Let's see how this goes!)

Edit -- Just want to clarify, if you are anti-trans and you want to express the viewpoint here, you are welcome to do so, but please do so in a manner that isn't bashing trans people. The idea here is to have a reasoned discussion, so please, civil discourse only.
 
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gibby

Member
I don't know why some people hate them , they are probably the type of people that hate a lot of things. What the feck it has to do with anyone else? people are entitled to be who they are it is no one else's business or place to judge them. Let them walk a mile in that person's shoes before they judge!

A lot of people do not realise how good they have it compared to others, a lot of it is ignorance, sometimes I despair of this world, then someone does something kind and my faith is restored,I would like to think that overall peoples attitudes are changing to being more positive regarding trans people, i hope it continues.
 

PGen98

I, Am I?
Community Leader
I don't know why some people hate them , they are probably the type of people that hate a lot of things. What the feck it has to do with anyone else? people are entitled to be who they are it is no one else's business or place to judge them. Let them walk a mile in that person's shoes before they judge!
I completely agree with this, let these people experience gender dysphoria for a while, see how it feels to experience life as though you were born the wrong gender, see how it feels to experience that level of anxiety, anger and despair, and then get that same hatred they dish out right back for trying to fix their feelings of dysphoria. That would be fairly fitting.

A lot of people do not realise how good they have it compared to others, a lot of it is ignorance, sometimes I despair of this world, then someone does something kind and my faith is restored,I would like to think that overall peoples attitudes are changing to being more positive regarding trans people, i hope it continues.

You're very right, a good deal of it is ignorance, a total lack of what it is to struggle in any way, and to hate anything they don't understand. I hope more people educate themselves and ignorance becomes less of a factor. People don't deserve hate just for being themselves. Even if you don't like or agree with their lifestyle, it's not for anyone to judge others, just understand it's their life and they're trying their best to be their authentic selves.
 
Certain trans women make it their life's mission to actually make life more difficult for (female) women. What I mean by this is that they will go out of their way to force themselves into sensitive spaces such as locker rooms, bathrooms, beauty salons (that focus on waxing), and female-only dating sites. I know a lesbian woman who doesn't hate transwomen but she wants nothing to do with them because she feels like she is being attacked and silenced as a gay woman again.
 
The only time I would be against a trans person being sexually attracted to whoever they was attracted to is in the case of if they was attracted to children or animals - and acted on their attractions, having sex with kids and animals etc. Or in the case of if they was attracted to another adult but the other adult wasnt interested so they raped them. Apart from that, I think trans should be allowed to get whatever happiness they can, however they can :)
 

PGen98

I, Am I?
Community Leader
Certain trans women make it their life's mission to actually make life more difficult for (female) women. What I mean by this is that they will go out of their way to force themselves into sensitive spaces such as locker rooms, bathrooms, beauty salons (that focus on waxing), and female-only dating sites. I know a lesbian woman who doesn't hate transwomen but she wants nothing to do with them because she feels like she is being attacked and silenced as a gay woman again.
I think it's a bit harsh to want nothing to do with trans women as a whole, not all trans women are looking to use the womens' bathroom or go in the womens' locker room, most are actually just trying to be who they are and be comfortable in their own skin. Are there people who take advantage of the system? Of course there are, and I cringe whenever I see anything about Jessica Yaniv, for example, but 98% of trans women are nothing like that.
The only time I would be against a trans person being sexually attracted to whoever they was attracted to is in the case of if they was attracted to children or animals - and acted on their attractions, having sex with kids and animals etc. Or in the case of if they was attracted to another adult but the other adult wasnt interested so they raped them. Apart from that, I think trans should be allowed to get whatever happiness they can, however they can :)
Oh absolutely, no one can tolerate going after children or animals, and rape is a horrible offense. These aren't really common among trans women, but I completely agree that when they occur they need to be taken seriously and prosecuted vigorously!
 

PGen98

I, Am I?
Community Leader
Being trans shouldnt be a "get out of the jails free" card if they do hurt women or children or do rapes, i think.
Oh I absolutely agree, nothing is a get out of jail free card when it comes to those subjects. Anyone, irrespective of gender, creed or background should get away with those crimes.
 
I don't hate them, I just don't want them to throw it in my face. Congratulations, you want to be a girl but were born a boy or vice versa. You do you. As long as you don't hurt people, I don't care. Just stop saying it every other sentence/word and stop making that your whole identity.
 

zoldos

Member
The only time I would be against a trans person being sexually attracted to whoever they was attracted to is in the case of if they was attracted to children or animals - and acted on their attractions, having sex with kids and animals etc. Or in the case of if they was attracted to another adult but the other adult wasnt interested so they raped them. Apart from that, I think trans should be allowed to get whatever happiness they can, however they can :)
I'd be against ANY person who does that, not just Trans....
 

Catsmother

Don't mess with The Catsmother!
It's totally wrong all the hate towards the LGBTQ community. I often wonder those who do hate on them what if their kids grew up wanting to be Trans etc?

I grew up in the 1980's and it was very bad then. Nowadays it is bad but not as bad.

I have nothing against anyone who is Gay etc. I feel sorry for them and all the abuse they do get. It's just awful.
 

Lammchen

Member
I don't hate them, I just don't want them to throw it in my face. Congratulations, you want to be a girl but were born a boy or vice versa. You do you. As long as you don't hurt people, I don't care. Just stop saying it every other sentence/word and stop making that your whole identity.

This is something I see a lot of and it's one reason why people get annoyed by some trans people.

Even in my small country town there was someone who was obviously a large male dressed as a female. No one would have said anything but then he started talking to me casually and people listened to see what I would say. I'm the type of person who is totally approachable and people tend to want to tell me their life stories.

So this person asked me if I carried mace (it was there in the check out line we were standing in) and I said I carry pepper spray at which point I was congratulated. And then came the big story about why this person became trans and how everyone hated her for doing it. I know people need to feel loved but to loudly start complaining about others hating to a complete stranger isn't very rational. It's examples like this that gives trans people a poor reputation.

I want to end my example here by stating that I remained calm and kind toward this individual. After I checked out I saw her crying in the parking lot having some type of breakdown. My sister said that the hormones they're on can cause mental issues.
 

Dave

Member
I don't believe that, in general, people hate others for who they are or what they wish to be. What really gets to people is how others parade it and wear it like a badge of honour. 'I'm gay and I'm proud' well, 'I'm not gay and don't give a shit' if you want people to care about you and what you believe then you need to just be who you are; no badges, no pronouns, no flashing it in people's faces.

I have gay friends and they don't wear a badge, they want to be accepted for who they are and not to be judged on their sexuality and all of them are very kind, caring people and that's who I accept them for. When something is thrown in your face day after day you soon tire of it and the point then loses the meaning being pushed.

When trans people start telling others 'I don't want you to refer to me as him/her but instead refer to me as them/they' - there's a medical definition for people like that, it's called schizophrenia and has nothing to do with sexuality. If someone is a man and wants to be a woman, or vice versa, then just do what you feel is right for you without parading it in front of others.

I don't hate people, but I often hate the way they go on; but then that's the world we live in now and I am so pleased to say that I am moving into my twilight years and often think to myself how much I would detest being born into this world as it is now. Far too much conflict and too little compassion and love and just accepting people for who they are.
 
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Catsmother

Don't mess with The Catsmother!
I don't feel sorry for someone simply being themselves. But the abuse and hatred is a great shame and shows how pathetic and shallow people can be....
I meant more on the lines of the abuse they get.

It must be horrible for them to be in the wrong body.
 

zoldos

Member
I meant more on the lines of the abuse they get.

It must be horrible for them to be in the wrong body.
But why is this suddenly such a big deal? 20 years ago no one was talking about being a "girl in a man's body" or vice versa. Why is it now this huge deal and everyone is born in the wrong body or is trans?
 

Lee

Can't get enough...!
Community Leader
But why is this suddenly such a big deal? 20 years ago no one was talking about being a "girl in a man's body" or vice versa. Why is it now this huge deal and everyone is born in the wrong body or is trans?
That’s what happens when the population becomes more understanding. People don’t feel the need to hide who they are any more. I don’t think there are more people who feel trapped now compared to any amount of years ago, I just think people are now more willing to talk about it, which in my opinion is great because why should somebody live a lie…?

I welcome people to be whoever they want to be. What difference does it make to us if someone is trans, gay, bi or anything else?

Live and let be. :)
 

zoldos

Member
That’s what happens when the population becomes more understanding. People don’t feel the need to hide who they are any more. I don’t think there are more people who feel trapped now compared to any amount of years ago, I just think people are now more willing to talk about it, which in my opinion is great because why should somebody live a lie…?

I welcome people to be whoever they want to be. What difference does it make to us if someone is trans, gay, bi or anything else?

Live and let be. :)
Yes agreed. Valid point...
 

Catsmother

Don't mess with The Catsmother!
But why is this suddenly such a big deal? 20 years ago no one was talking about being a "girl in a man's body" or vice versa. Why is it now this huge deal and everyone is born in the wrong body or is trans?
To me it's no big deal. should be who you want to be as long as you're not hurting others.
 
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